Loyalty. Trust.

Listening to: "White Cluster" - Opeth
Mood: Annoyed

You break your loyalty then you inevitably shatter the trust you have built. Both are ineluctably linked. (And yes, I just realised how many of my posts have been about how things are all some how linked, but they all are. It's unavoidable.) However, my realisation of this undeniable connection happened to be possibly the worst way to discover it, and quite frankly I'm annoyed that it happened. Not only simply because it had happened, but because it happened at such awful timing. How is the timing awful? Well considering I close the chapter of my highschool life next Wednesday (30th of September), I would have liked to have ended on a good note, but instead I get stuck with this juvenile, immature rubbish. Not to mention it's awful timing because it's crashed me from my wonderful mood that I've had since my 18th birthday last Thursday.

So I'm guessing you want to know what this crazy link+rant it about. Surprise, surprise, it's about the Year 12 formal. So the tables have been organised, seating plan handed to the seating coordinator in our grade and things were brilliant and rosy; everyone was happy. However, that took a turn for the worst today. As I sat enjoying the mid-morning sun, and munching away on my morning tea a girl I don't particularly like nor get along with drops a bombshell, she's no longer bringing a partner and would like to sit on our table once again. Now thing is, the seating plan was to a T, a perfect, full 10 person table. We had no spare room, except my partner who's request is still being pended.

Now, this is the part that has turned my fantastic mood to see the worst. My "friends", one of which I considered to be a "best friend" all dislike this girl, let's call her CC. They all dislike her and were elated that she was sitting at another table, however, today they decided that they'd fight the battle with her, against me. Simply because my partner wasn't a definitely they decided, well you can "cancel" your invitation. Firstly, that's possibly the rudest suggestion I've ever heard. I'm stunned that it was even suggested. How can you possibly ask someone to do that? How can you ask someone to take their invitation back? Sure, it's not vital that I have a partner, but I have already asked and it's incredibly rude if I took my invitation back. What am I suppose to say? "Sorry. You can't come to my formal because I need to put this girl I don't like in your spot." A bit harsh I reckon.

Everyone in my group, and I mean EVERYONE, especially my "best friend" told me that "it's fine, you don't need your partner, just tell them not to come". What confuses me is that they worked so hard to try to convince me to get rid of my partner, or move. So furious as I was, I just said "f*** it, I'll move tables". Luckily, I get along with a heap of girls outside our group and I move myself to be with a group of girls that wouldn't make such an outrageous request.

I'm only annoyed as hell because my "best friend" decides that instead of backing me up she'll do this to me. I don't even know what to call 'this'. Nobody backed me up, but instead joined in and decides that this option is best, to give me this ultimatum. And now that I see where my "best friend" and "friends' " loyalty lie I know who I can trust, and it's definitely not them.

xx